The first cut is the deepest...

Okay...first of all, thank God in heaven American Idol auditions are over.

Next, let me just give the contestants a little advice. Pretend you asked for it. Cause we all know that judges, producers, fans, and contestants read this blog. At least they should if they had any sense. Oh, but I digress. Anyway.

#1. If you think that you are the next American Idol, DO NOT (yes, I used all freaking caps!) bad-mouth or diss past idols who have made it where you freaking want to be. If you had a freaking brain in your ugly bald head, you would know that you might have to make it past Simon, Paula, and Randy right now...but you have to make it past the viewing audience later...and you ain't getting Ava's vote if you diss Carrie Underwood. You probably just lost about oh, a million votes...all little girls Ava's age. Talk crap about Bo...and you've lost my vote and all his fans as well. You...Double Freak Twins...need to be winning votes because you can't sing...you're freaking ugly as hell...and let's just say, charm...uh, not your strong point. Oh, and another thing...leave the cowboy alone. He's got a lot more fans now than you do...and bless his heart...he has something that you don't....charm. #1 is not just for the Double Freak twins...but hey, if the shoe fits, wear it.

#2. Please watch your freaking mouth. Show a little class. Hey, I'm not a prude. But when every word you say is bleeped out...you really can't make a point. Can you?

Okay...I'm too put out to give any more advice right now. You probably wouldn't take it anyway. So why waste my breath?

But I do have to say that I am so thankful that the hoochie mama who took somebody else's money and now has to go back to Queens and tell them that sheeeee didn'ttttttt maaaaaaake itttttttttt wasn't from Louisiana. They always put the people who make the state look stupid in front of the camera. Thank God it was New York's turn tonight. Not Louisiana.

Please tell me why they send the good twins home and let the Double Freak twins stay? The Idol producers hate me. I just know it. They like to see me suffer. And then to make it freaking worse...the Double Freak twins are gonna hook the good twins up with some producer friend of theirs. Oh, dear God.

I used all caps and the words freaking and ain't in one post. So sue me. Oh, and I was judgemental. Like I said...so what.