Read at your own risk...

Once again, I've been writing and rewriting. I want to write about what's going on here. I want to write about how I feel. This is my journal. I guess I just don't want to sound depressed or angry. Even though there may have moments that I've actually felt that way. I am so lucky. I know that. I'm trying to get back to normal but what exactly is that?

In my area, we are trying really hard to get life back to normal. We have power and clean water at my house. But there are places around my area they are still without power. Our water system is safe but school has been out all week because of contaminated water in the parish. You can't buy ice in Pineville and the gas supply is limited. Where you can get gas, they usually have one grade. I saw $3.09 per gallon yesterday. I asked M this morning when we're going to get out of the "preparation" mindset. When are we going to stop to get gas when we need it...not when it moves off of "Full?" When are we going to stop stocking up on water and can goods with pop tops everytime we go into a store? When will I feel comfortable about replanting my garden without the fear of another hurricane coming through and destroying it? When am I going to be able to watch the news (something other than the weather or the tragedy) and not say..."Who freaking cares?" Now, I know I am among the lucky ones in my state. So many in so many parishes have lost everything. I still haven't heard from my uncle in Westlake which is in Cameron parish...other than that he made it through the storm. I don't know the situation down there but from what I've heard there is no power, water, stores are closed and medical care is non-existent. Surely, he's not still there?

The suffering is so widespread. Now, after Rita, it's even more widespread...not just southern Mississippi and NOLA but ALL of Louisiana's southern parishes. Fifty four parishes in Louisiana have been declared states of emergency. I've been reading different things where it seems some people resent the attention NOLA is getting. New Orleans (or was) a huge, world-famous city. But it was also home to many hard working, law abiding citizens (not that you can tell from what they show on television, though). It's gone. The number of dead is rising daily. Of course, it's getting media attention. All it is...is media attention. Much of it isn't the kind of attention most of us want. It's getting no more help than anyone else. Now, I'm not downplaying the loss in Mississippi. I love Mississippi. I was born in Mississippi. I feel for each and every person and family who lost their lives as they knew it in Katrina. But I don't think it's the "stepchild" in this situation. The state and local governments just weren't as incapable of handling the tragedy in Mississippi as they were in Louisiana. Not that that is something that we are proud of but that's why the media is in NOLA. NOLA is not the only story in this tragedy. No, South Mississippi and all of South Louisiana...have their own stories...all of which need to be told. Nobody has it good right now...no matter where you live. We all are feeling the pain. We can only offer what we can to those in need and keep them all in our prayers.

Okay...rant over. If you are still with me, I'll try for life as normal now.

I'm sitting here today waiting for the guy to come take down those uprooted trees in my front yard. The first estimate we got for those trees was $2,500. Then we called some other people and we got an estimate of $900. Do you think this was an example of price gouging? We were lucky to be able to get them down so quickly. I have to go to work when we get this taken care of.

Oh, I went back to my French class yesterday. It was good to get back to that routine. I was afraid that I had forgotten everything I'd learned since we hadn't been in class for a week. Just being back in class was good. We got our test from last Wednesday...and I made an "A!" I'm freakin' amazed!

Now, Smucker's makes Uncrustables in grilled cheese. I do love me some grilled cheese! (I'm trying really hard...can you tell?)

Okay...I'm going to go sit on the porch until the tree cutters come.